The Elephant's Child

That's a Funny Looking Cat.

Never Have That Problem.

"Often, codependent people are so out of touch with themselves that they have trouble even making a list of activities they enjoy."

 

I have the opposite problem, actually. Lots and lots of things that I love to do or want to do, but can't at the moment due to space, time, money, or all three.  Someday, someday...  When Sparkle Kitty leaves for college, maybe, if we're not totally broke. 

Lots of road trips to take.  Mad Musician and I have a running list of interesting old cars we'd love to own at least once before we die.  Things to make, to paint, to sew.  Work to do on the house.  Books to read... you never run out of books to read, really. 

I cannot begin to imagine a life where I had so lost myself that I could not dream up a list of activities that I love doing.  How sad and frightening. 

Craigsworst.

If you don't like snotty rants, stop reading here.  Right now.  I mean it. 

Really, how many different ways is it possible to spell "wrought?"  Wrot, Rot, Rod... any possible way but the correct one, apparently, if you're listing on Craigslist. 

I think you mean "Toshiba".  I'm not sure how you got "Tabisha" out of that, but you spelled it that way several times, so I can only assume you think that's how Toshiba is spelled, even though there's no such brand of televisions. 

For the final time, scare quotes do not add emphasis, other than to emphasise that you don't know how to properly punctuate.  Let  go of the shift key and step away from the computer. 

If you say "price is negotiable" but then say, "But NO LOWBALLERS" I'm not going to come talk to you, because how in the world would I know what's "low-balling" your 1973 near-rusted out RV that you claim "runs good" but looks like there's probably a Bee-Gees album stuck in the 8 track? And really, could you not have removed the dirty clothes from the furniture you're trying to sell before you took a picture?

There's no excuse for misspelling "Camaro."  It's printed in great big huge letters right into the plastic at the back of the car. 

Actually, that goes for every other car you're listing.  You say "title in hand" so look at it.  There's the car model, right there. Copy it. 

 And if you REALLY want to sell me something, please, oh, please, for the love of humanity, don't scream "NO EMAILS! TEXT ME ONLY!" at me.  You're using the I N T E R N E T to list your item; one presumes that you have email or a  t e l e p h o n e. 

While we're discussing things, do try to include photos that actually show the item you're trying to sell.  It doesn't do me much good to see half of the front windshield of a car or a black fuzzy blob that presumably a couch but could be Sasquatch for all I can tell. 

 

Wedding Card.

(Image from here, which appears to be a free resource.  I am not selling the card; was a one-off for my brother's wedding.)

When Memes Collide and Mutate.

Doormat Annie.

I do understand what the intention is here: to teach children to be a gracious guest while at someone else's house and to be gracious hostess while you are entertaining.  To not be a spoiled brat.

This concept is shouted ad naseum throughout the entire book: be nice so people will like you. But never discussed is what Annie should do should her friends chose to engage in something naughty and are encouraging Annie to participate.  Never discussed is the fact that sometimes you need to stand up for yourself.

 

Cheerful Annie.

Don't be like Annie.  Always have a pleasant personality.

 

Charming Annie

Culled from a very odd homeschooling book on art and good manners that I bought secondhand:

Portions of this book are a real scream. I'll think you'll be seeing more from it.

The Internet Has An Answer for Any Question.

Wiki on Baby Jesus Theft.

 

I Care About You Only As Far As I Don't Have To Do Laundry After You Visit.